Thursday, August 14, 2014

Upside Down







Yesterday a friend sent me an email checking in on some things I was supposed to finish and she graciously gave me an out by saying "I am sure things in your life are upside down right now."

Which is the absolute truth.
Things are all upside down right now, and never more so than yesterday.

Yesterday the moving caught up with me.
I was tired.
I was cranky.
I was mad about all the things that got put into storage instead of into our rent house (the boys fav toys, my good camera, the peanut butter...)
I was impatient with myself.
I was worn threadbare in all the wrong places.

The truth is that  I had been all of these things for days, but I  kept shoving them to the back of the to-take-care-of list, in favor of more urgent task.

Getting beds made (yes our mattresses are on the floor on purpose. Since we don't know how long we will be renting we went with minimal furniture. It is sort of like camping inside. Fun! Right?)

Unpacking the kitchen (I have way more plates than a family of four needs. Miraculously it all just fit.)

Making sure we had toilet paper.

Buying more peanut butter.

Going to work.

Monitoring homework (a little trickier without our Internet set up yet.)

But by the end of yesterday I was fini.
The steak we had for dinner time we had dinner may have been medium rare, but I was well done.
All of the exhaustion and holding-it-together came apart at the seems.

So as soon as the dishes hit the sink I vamoosed.
I poured myself a jelly jar full of boxed red wine, adjusted our fancy new rabbit ears on the television, got into bed and proceeded to watch network television in real time for the first time in years.
The Mindy Project? Adorbs. 
Person of Interest? I can't decide. I think I like it?
Also, local news? Oh my golly, it is so depressing.

Eventually I fell asleep and today I woke up feeling better.
Not quite right side up but I am getting there.

Moving is hard y'all.
Moving into a temporary situation is hard.
Moving while balancing work and kids and school and pets and missing boxes is hard.

As is typical, I am learning another facet of being present. Of going slow. Of not pushing myself too hard.

I tend to forget that there is no shame in being tired.
That time and space is needed to adjust to big life changes, and pushing through like nothing has changed doesn't do me any good. 

I tend to forget that I am human and that I have limits. Limits that are different from other peoples
And that there is no shame in that either.

So here is to this season of upside down being.
To going slow.
To taking my time adjusting.
To being upside down as long as needed.

peace and blessings-
J


2 comments:

  1. Girl I hear you! I am trying to sale one house in Texas and move to another in Arkansas. Upside down and worn threadbare in all the wrong places. So true! Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  2. You have so much going on - leaving your home, moving to new place, starting new job, new school/s, and more! Take good care of yourself. Remember, you are loved!

    ReplyDelete

ok, really. tell me the truth... do these comments make me look fat?

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