Monday, May 30, 2011

what friends are for

Saturday night I received a rude and strange comment on this here blog.
Saturday night I wrote an open letter to that Anonymous commenter, pressed "publish," showed the post to Sweet Man and then closed my laptop and went to bed.
I was completely unprepared for what happened next.

 Withing 3 minutes of hitting posting my letter the floodgates of true friendship and sisterhood broke wide open, spilling amazing rivers of  kindness, empathy, support, love and solidarity over me and every gal who has ever spent the majority of her childhood hiding in the bathroom when everyone else at a sleepover was changing. 

I don't know what Anonymous wished to accomplish with her (or his I suppose) comment, but I have a feeling that the gifts of friendship that I have received over the past 48 hours were not the end goal.
I have read every single comment on the blog, on Facebook and on Twitter multiple times.
I have laughed, cried and cheered.

I hope that if you have time you go back and read the comments because the truth is in there: We are not alone. We all struggle. We all feel less then. We all have our stories. And we should share them, not hide them, because the truth is we all feel different, strange, odd-gal-out from time to time, for different reasons. And the fact that we feel this way, this separateness, is actually one of the things that we all have in common. Pretending that we don't feel this way is perhaps the loneliest place of all. 

So thank you for letting me be honest. For letting me share a part of my story, for letting me admit my imperfections and limitations and brokenness. And for sharing with me yours. For crying with me. For standing up for me. For reaching out and saying "me too!"  
This has erased so much aloneness in my heart and I hope that maybe it has erased some of your aloneness too. Because you are not alone, you really aren't. And if you ever need reminding of that, please let me know. I will come to your side and cheer you on and sing back to you all the love and beauty that you have sung to me these past few days.
Because that is what friends are for.



  1. I am sorry for those hurtful words. And happy for your positive energy. I love you blog, your creativity, your beauty. Mean people are just that mean. They are hurt and angry on the inside. Your sharing your life and stories inspire me!

    1. Looks very beautiful.

  2. I read your post yesterday and was mulling it about in my head since - hating that a comment like that was hurtful and uncalled for. I am happy to see the post today and know that blogland has surrounded you with love and support with our own stories. I think so many of us have had our personal issues with weight and how we are perceived by the world. I just know that your colorful posts always make me happy and I love peeking into your happy world. Life is what you make of it and you have made it good.
    p.s. loving the gal with the blackboard...another reason to smile!

  3. I read your post and the comments and just want to say you are a lady full of grace and kindness. That fact shines through on your blog.

  4. I love that your honesty brings true friendship to your heart.

    Also I love how you have the Angel Head quoting scripture.


  5. I read all the wonderful supportive comments you rightfully received. You were honest and put yourself out there. Yes many of us could relate including myself. You are a beautiful woman both inside and out. Sending you virtual (((HUGS))).


  6. Oh no! Must go read. I got a mean comment last week too. I erased it because I was so surprised by the unkindness. Now I wish I had shared it with everyone. Will go and read.

  7. I read your post last night about the mean comment and I even typed a comment and then didn't publish it. I was too concerned about how it would make me look or sound. I didn't sleep very well last night. I don't know why for sure, but every time I'd wake up and toss and turn, I'd think of you and that comment. I don't post pictures of myself on my blog (not one) and only have one photo of myself on my personal Facebook page (from the waste up, halfway sandwiched behind my husband with a baggy jacket). I am so insecure and worried about what people would think of me. I was fat kid called whale at the pool. I lost it going into junior high and was actually athletic in high school. Then in college I was once again the chubby one. Now I'm 36 and find myself at the dietician since May 6 and I've lost 3 pounds in 3 weeks (I started reading "Made to Crave" by Lysa Tuerkherst). More weight than I've lost in 15 years. I admire you so much for your courage and dream of being secure enough in God's love and in who I am that I can one day freely post my photos, as you do. You really handled this situation with grace. God bless.

    P.S. I love your blog.

  8. I just wanted to tell you that I have been thinking about this for a while now and your post inspired me to finally put the words out into the world. Thanks so much. Here's my post if you are interested:

  9. There are some truly odd people in the world who are clearly very unhappy within themselves and their life. Your happiness shows through your blog, maybe it is too much for them! Take care Jerusalem - Rachaelxo

  10. I rarely make a comment to you - but I read your blog and it is my "go to place" when I need a smile. I find your whole family, your wit, your thoughts, your comments.......nothing but sheer joy.
    Concentrate on those who love you and think you are precious, just as you are.
    Life is too short to worry about "unhappy people who are jealous of your life". Period.

    Jerusalem, you are a treasure, pure and simple.

  11. I just read this article and got a glimpse of hope for the future. For us curvy girls (real girls) and our daughters and granddaughters.

  12. I have not read the comment, but I simply don't know why someone would intentionally say something hurtful to you. I'm sorry you experienced that. However, look at the way you are able to reach others through that experience. Amen!

  13. what a great post!i've been so surprised and blessed by the friendships i've made through blogging. glad you were lifted up.

  14. This just confirms for me that bad things happen so bigger positive things can result. If that person had not made that comment you would not have known how many people love and appreciate you and your blog. Many of us would not have been inspired by your responce and each others stories.
    You did a great job turning this around!

  15. I have been following your blog for a few weeks now...found you through stumbling around on the web and the Arkansas Women Bloggers site (don't ask me how, because I simply don't know ;)), but being a fellow, life-long Arkansan, I loved your blog the first time I read it. You handled the comment from anonymous with such grace! Well done. Weight does not define us as people, or women for that matter. Who we are...those attitudes, the amazing love we have, the joy we find and the grace to overcome adversity...THAT'S who we are...not a measurement on a scale (which, by the way, is never the same between twisted ;)). So, with that being said, you are a beautiful lady - inside and out - and you make me proud to be from Arkansas. Take care...

  16. wow! catching up on all the blogs I read and sorry this happened to you. I have received one as well before.
    your blog is always full of color, encouragement & joyfulness. keep blogging I love your blog and writing....


  17. I've never commented on a blog. Never. I pop in every couple of days to catch up on yours. I love it. I remember seeing the 14 years post a few days ago and I wanted you to know that not once did weight cross my mind. I thought, "what a cute couple," "she has a great smile," "I wish I had her hair," and "oh look, her husband has facial hair now." i am by most accounts, skinny, but I just had my 2nd child and feel very insecure about my body. Your reply, and feelings, apply to everyone. Big or small. While I know it's not the point, I've looked at various pictures you've had of yourself in the past and often been a wee bit jealous of how pretty and adorable you are. I weigh about 80lbs less, but it doesn't matter. Pretty is pretty and there's no hiding it. You're beautiful on the outside and although I don't know you personally, you sound gorgeous on the inside.

  18. Now that Im here Im wondering how on Earth Ive never discovered your blog before. I must live under a rock! LOVE your home!
    *Here from life Made Lovely Monday linkup

  19. i haven't been following your blog for very long, but adore your blog. :) i love this colorful little space in your home. :) sorry that you had a comment from a meanie. :( you handled it with such grace. :) hugs to you!


ok, really. tell me the truth... do these comments make me look fat?

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...