so you are probably wondering when we are moving to the country and adopting all those kids.
yeah, me too.
the only answer I seem to be getting is this one:
maybe not for a while.
but here's the deal.
I am okay with this. I am okay with this answer because I know that a) most things I have forced to happen have ended up biting me in the arse. Or at least causing a lot of tears.
and b) God has filled our life up with some pretty great things in the meantime and I am grateful and my heart is full. Very full. As are my days.
One of the favorite things 2011 has brought me so far is a a car load of 6th grade girls that I have the pleasure of carpooling in various combination's a few times a week. They are the children of some of my closest friends - the kind who feel more like family than not and so having them around is easy peasy. On the days we carpool my car fills up with these long legged creatures and all their bags (oh the amount of bags girls have compared to the boys!) and I love listening to their chatter, their woes, their intense annoyance with their younger siblings, their excitement over new purses, jackets and books, and of course there is the school gossip which is always interesting since I work there. Also all of these girls and their host of siblings live within 1 mile or less of our house, and I have been known to entice them all over for visits with promises of craft lessons and free reign over my kitchen to bake sweet treats. On the days when a few of them come home with us from school to play, I love how their voices round out the sounds of laughter, playing and even arguing around the house. The mixture of the giggles and squeals with the automatic gun noises and "explosions" that I am used to from my boys always takes me by surprise. On those days my home feels fuller than full and I cannot help but smile.
Another change this spring is that Wylie is in his first "real" play at the Children's Theatre. Rehearsals started this week and I thanked the blessed stars that we only live 10 minutes away from the theatre and not in the country (yet.) Especially with gas being $3.50 a gallon and our current school/work/life schedule being what it is. If we lived further away I honestly do not know if we could pull off his rehearsal schedule without someone losing a limb or at least a lot of hair. And he is so unbelievably proud and excited that I am beyond thankful that we are able to help make this dream a reality for him.
And finally we do have a new member of the household that just moved in.
But she can feed, dress and drive herself.
My youngest sister Judea has moved in with us for the next year (at least.)
This was a move that just felt right for all of us. She is fresh out of college and establishing herself as a photographer. All of her contacts and mentor are here and since she works freelance it will take a while for her to get her feet under her financially. She has lived with us before as a student, in the summers etc. This time it is a little more permanent and "real." The boys are over the moon and so am I.
The truth is that I am one of those oddballs that could live in a commune or similar community. In my dream world my sisters, mother and grandmothers and best friends would each have houses on the same piece of property as me and we would all be in and out of each others houses constantly.
I know not everyone wants to live like this, but I love it and having Judea here is a small taste of that life.
As for moving to a farm and building/finding "the" house that is still on the Someday List, but for now we are happily staying put in this one. We are planting a garden (well Sweet Man is and I am going to help) and we are looking into yard chickens. I am going to paint the dining room and the kitchen this year (yes I am!) and this week I hung tons of paper chains in the living room as a celebration - a celebration of living in the moment, of living in the gifts we have been given today, and just enjoying life.
All of the changes 2011 has brought so far are a gift - even in the waiting- they have been unexpected & unplanned but they have also been wonderful, fulfilling and filled with beauty.
We are not giving up on the other dreams - the adoptions, the country life, the farm... we still feel like those are things we are supposed to do and we have faith that when the time is right it will be obvious, but for now what is obvious is what has been put in front of us - this home, this life, this community- and I do not want to miss the beauty in these things because I am pinning away for something that is not yet.
And because you don't look a gift horse in the mouth. You just say thank you.